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Antonio stayed on the couch, too hurt by Gabi’s words to sleep beside her in their bed. He knew she was deeply grieving the loss of their son, but so was he. He wanted so badly to help her work through it all. Why wouldn’t she let him?
Antonio stared at the ceiling for hours, praying for sleep that never came. Well then, maybe it’s yours...Gabi’s words echoed in his head. What if it was his fault? What if God really was punishing him for leaving the church? God didn’t hate him or Gabi or Michael, but maybe he was punishing Antonio. Did he really believe that? Finally, with a pounding headache, Antonio closed his eyes and slipped off to sleep. Gabi woke up early, even though she had hardly slept at all. She was relieved to find Antonio not in their bed. She needed to get out of the house, away from memories of Michael, away from Antonio. She decided she would return to work. Gabi walked into the living room as her eyes fell on Antonio curled up asleep on the couch. She turned quickly, grabbing her purse and for the first time in over a week, left the apartment. THE STATION Gabi walked slowly into the station. It was still early and the front desk was deserted. She headed to her own desk, finding stacks of reports to be handled. She was glad to have something to focus on other than her grief. She sat down and began to sort through the mess. "Gabi?" Ricardo’s deep, smooth voice called out. "You’re back." Gabi looked up to see Ricardo smiling at her. "Yes, Ricardo. I needed to get back." "I’m glad you’re here. Are you..." he hesitated. "Yes, I’m fine, Ricardo. I’m anxious to get back to work," Gabi focused her attention to the papers before her. Ricardo highly doubted she was ready to be back at work, it had only been a week since Michael’s death, but he knew she was looking to refocus her energy. "Gabi," he said softly. "Let me know if you need anything." "Thank you, Ricardo," she replied without looking up. THE APARTMENT Antonio dreamt he was sitting on the beach holding Michael in his lap. He was promising his son that he would teach him to surf one day, but not for awhile since Michael was only two. The toddler looked up at his father, "Daddy," he said in that adorable baby talk. Antonio smiled at his dark, curly haired son sitting on his lap pointing a tiny finger at him. Antonio woke suddenly looking around the room. He grabbed his head as it was still pounding from the night before. He got up from the couch and headed to the bedroom. He expected to see Gabi asleep, but was surprised to find her nowhere in the apartment. He wandered into the kitchen finding a note on the refrigerator. I went to work. Gabi Antonio crumpled the paper in his hand and threw it at the wall. "Damn it!" he said loudly. He was glad Gabi had gone back to work, he knew she needed to focus on something other than Michael, but he had wanted to try and talk things over with her. He loved her more than life itself and couldn’t stand thinking she really might blame him for their son’s death. Antonio headed into the bathroom for some aspirin and a shower before heading to work. He thought about calling Gabi to see how she was doing, but didn’t want to get into anything with her over the phone. He dressed and headed off to The Deep. THE STATION Gabi piled up the last of the finished reports. Ricardo walked up and perched himself on the corner of her desk. "It’s pretty late, Gabi. Why don’t you head home?" "I just have a few more things to do here, I don’t mind," she said distractedly. "I’m sure Antonio is getting worried..." "I’m sure he’s fine," Gabi snapped, surprising Ricardo by her tone. "I mean, I’m sure he’s at work and probably very busy," she tried unsuccessfully to cover. "Is everything okay, Gabi? With the two of you, I mean," Ricardo asked gently. "Yes, Ricardo. If you don’t mind, I need to finish this spreadsheet for Chief Harris." Ricardo knew her well enough to tell she lying. "Okay, Gabi. I’ll see you tomorrow, then." Ricardo didn’t want to leave, but he didn’t think it would be a good idea to push her right now. Things were obviously strained between her and Antonio and Ricardo would just wait to see what direction it was going to take. "Good night, Ricardo," she called without looking up. As soon as Ricardo was gone, Gabi sat back in the chair and rubbed her shoulders. It had been a tough day. Everyone was handling her with kid gloves and she wished they would all stop pitying her and just act normal. She looked at the clock, it was 9:30. Reluctantly, she packed up her things to head home. She was pretty tired. THE APARTMENT Antonio sat quietly on the couch wondering what could possibly be keeping Gabi at work so late. As hurt as he still was by what she had said, caring about Gabi was second nature to him and a part of himself he couldn’t just turn off. He walked to the patio doors looking for her car. Suddenly, the door opened as Gabi arrived home. "Hey, I was getting worried," Antonio blurted out without thinking. "I’m fine. You don’t have to worry about me," Gabi said flatly. "Well, I do worry about you, Gabi. You’re my wife." Antonio walked towards her. "Yes, I know," she said turning away from him. Antonio was hurt by the tone in her voice. "Gabi, we need to talk." "No, Antonio, I don’t want to talk. Shouldn’t you be at work?" she asked impatiently. "I told Ben I needed tonight off. We need to work through things, Gabi. We need to finish our discussion from last night," he said softly. "There is nothing more to discuss, Antonio," she said blankly as she searched the pantry for something to eat. Antonio reached around grabbing her arm and turning her to face him. "Yes, there is Gabi." His face was inches away from hers and she could read the pain in his eyes. "Last night you said that maybe Michael’s death was my fault. Do you really believe that?" "Antonio," she whined, struggling to free herself from his grasp. "No, Gabi." He tightened his hold on her arm. "I want you to answer me," his eyes pleaded with her. "You’re hurting me, Antonio. Let me go." Gabi pulled her arm roughly away from him as she turned around. "Gabi, please talk to me. I love you, Gabi and I want us to work through this together..." Gabi spun around quickly. "Together?" she spat the word at him. "You mean together like how we were together when I lost Michael. Together like that?" Antonio was speechless as Gabi poked her finger into his chest three times, accenting the word. "I was alone, Antonio. Alone when our baby was born and alone when he died." No, Gabi didn’t think it was Antonio’s fault, but she did want to hurt him. She wanted to hurt him like it had hurt her to be alone when their baby had died. Her brown eyes were brimming with tears. "I know, Gabi. I’m sorry..." Antonio’s voice was soft and cracking. "I’m so sorry you were alone. I didn’t know what was happening. I didn’t know you were at the hospital, but Gabi, that doesn’t make it my fault…" "So, what are you saying - that it’s my fault," Gabi interrupted. "I know that’s what you think, Antonio. I know you blame me." She was intentionally picking the fight. "NO! It wasn’t your fault, Gabi. That’s not what I said. It wasn’t anyone’s fault," Antonio was becoming frustrated. "Why do you think that I blame you?" "YOU DO, ANTONIO! I know you do. You won’t say it, but I can see it in your eyes," Gabi was relentless. "Gabi, I don’t blame you." Antonio was desperate to make her understand. "I told you, God gives us miracles and sometimes..." "Stop it, just stop it!" Gabi yelled. "Don’t talk to me like that, Antonio. You’re not a priest anymore." Antonio’s heart twisted with the words. "I lost my son and..." "He was my son, too, Gabi," Antonio said painfully. "I lost him, too." "No, Antonio," Gabi said resolutely fighting to hold back the tears. "I lost him. He lived inside my body, he depended on me to sustain his life, and I couldn’t do it." Gabi slammed her fist against her chest. "MY BODY couldn’t do it." Gabi turned to walk out of the kitchen. Antonio grabbed her hand as she passed him. "Gabi, please, let me help you," Antonio begged her. "I know I can help you." "Stop being a priest, Antonio," Gabi sighed as she pulled her hand out of his and walked down the hall. Antonio stood with his head hanging down, tears filling his eyes. Gabi didn’t blame him or God for Michael’s death, she blamed herself. THE STATION The last two weeks had been complete hell for Gabi and Antonio. She wasn’t speaking to him and in an attempt to let her sort things out on her own, he had forced himself to step back from trying to help her. Gabi was burying herself in work at the station and Antonio worked late into the night at The Deep. Gabi was sleeping when Antonio arrived home and was up and off to work in the morning long before he was awake. They were sharing a bed, but little else. Ricardo sensed Gabi’s changed demeanor and was acutely aware that she and Antonio never spoke on the phone during the day. Gabi was even working on the weekends now. Ricardo had taken it all in and decided today was the day. "Gabi?" he querried, interrupting her from her work. "I was just wondering if maybe you wanted to grab some lunch?" "Sorry, Ricardo. Chief Harris wants these reports done by 2:00 so I have to skip it today." Gabi never looked up. "What about dinner?" he posed the question cautiously. "I know Antonio is working tonight, you really should take a break and have a good dinner." Gabi put her hand to her temple, rubbing it furiously. "See, you’re working yourself like a dog. Come on, let me take you to dinner. Just two old friends, family even..." Ricardo gave her one of his quirky half-smiles. "Sure, Ricardo. That would be nice." Gabi was actually relieved to have some company for the evening. She really wasn’t in the mood to go home alone again. "Great, I’ll see you later, then." Ricardo went into one of the empty interrogation rooms to use the phone. "Good afternoon. The Deep." "Antonio Torres, please?" Ricardo chirped. There was a long pause. "Hello, Antonio Torres." Antonio answered distractedly. "Hey, T. How you doin?" Ricardo asked casually. "Fine, Ricardo. I’m kind of busy, though. What can I do for you?" Antonio asked anxiously. "Actually, Maria wanted to get together tonight to talk about Benjy’s birthday party next week. I told her to meet me at the station at 7:00 and we would make some plans. Can you be here?" "I don’t know, Ricardo. Things are pretty busy here. I don’t really think I could get away." "Well, what if we meet you at the Deep? We could go over everything there?" Perfect, he thought. "Sure, Ricardo. Maria knows where to find me." Antonio conceded. "Great, see you later." Ricardo hung up the phone cheerfully. Everything was falling into place. Ricardo called Maria and left her a message to meet him and Antonio at The Deep at 7:00. He called Grenadines to make a reservation for two at 7:00 requesting one of the more secluded tables in the back. Ricardo hung up the phone with a mischievous grin. THE DEEP Antonio kept himself busy until 7:00. He was anxious to help Maria plan Benjy’s party. He loved his nephew and it made him happy to see Maria fawn over her child. "Hi, Antonio. Sorry I’m late." Maria called out breathlessly. "Tess was running an errand and I had to wait for her to get back." Antonio checked his watch. "I didn’t even realize it was so long after 7:00. I wonder where Ricardo is?" He looked around the club. "I don’t know. Maybe he got tied up at work. Why don’t you call the station ... I’m going to go find Ben for a second." Maria headed to the office. Antonio quickly dialed the station, secretly hoping Gabi would answer. "Sunset Beach Police, Officer Spencer speaking. May I help you?" Antonio’s heart sank a little. "Hi Spencer, this is Antonio. I was looking for Ricardo, is he there?" "Hey, Antonio. No, actually Ricardo left about a half hour ago," Spence answered. "Hmmm...he was supposed to meet Maria and I at 7. I guess he’s just running late." Antonio said flatly. "Yeah, I’m sure he and Gabi will be there soon," Spencer said nonchalantly. "Gabi?" Antonio asked surprisingly. "Yeah, I saw Ricardo and Gabi drive off together when I was getting back from a call. They were heading north, so they should be there soon." North? The Deep is South of the station. Antonio felt his blood pressure rising. "Thank you, Spence." He slammed the phone down with fury. Antonio felt a disturbing wave of anger and jealousy. What in the world was Gabi doing alone with Ricardo and where in the hell were they going?
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