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THE MISSION
"Bless me Father, for I have sinned," the woman began. "It’s been two months since my last confession." She paused. "I have been having an affair with my husband’s brother." Antonio felt a lump the size of a golf ball in his throat. "Yes," he replied quietly. "It’s been going on for some time now and my husband doesn’t know about it. We were just friends...he spent a lot of time at our house." The woman sniffled. "We became very close and I started to confide in him." "Yes," Antonio answered with more understanding than she could possibly comprehend. "We fell in love, Father. I love him." "And your husband?" Antonio asked as he looked to the floor. "Do you love your husband?" "I...it’s complicated," she offered sadly. "My husband is a wonderful man, I love him but I am not in love with him. Help me, Father." Antonio felt sick to his stomach. How could he offer his parishioners guidance when he had betrayed God and his vows and above all, his brother in the same manner? The words he used for solace seemed empty and deceptive. "Father?" the woman queried his silence. "Uh, yes," Antonio cleared his throat. "You have broken your marriage vows with your husband. Is it really fair to continue to live a lie with him when your heart is with another man?" He took a deep breath. "I would urge you to work on your marriage. You took a vow when you once loved each other very much. Try to find that love again, without the outside influence of his…brother. If you truly no longer love your husband, he deserves to know so that you both can move on with your lives. Your penance is two rosaries." The woman made the sign of the cross and exited the confessional. Antonio closed his eyes and sat in silence. He loved Gabi with his whole heart, but she was married to his brother and he was a priest who was ultimately committed to the church. Was it fair to Gabi to keep reminding her how much he loved her, but that the only part of himself he would ever be able to give her was physical and forbidden? He feelings were interfering with her ability to be a good wife to Ricardo and his ability to be a good priest. With incredible sadness, Antonio concluded that he could no longer express his love for Gabi, with words or actions. He made his choice to remain with God and he vowed to devote himself to being the best priest he could be, without Gabi. Ricardo and Gabi deserved every chance to make their marriage work and Antonio would have to deal with his feelings on his own. It was the only way. The phone rang three times before Antonio moved to answer it. He had been sitting in his office for over an hour. "Hello...Father Torres." "Father Antonio, this is Bishop Morgan. I need to see you in my office immediately." Antonio could tell by the tone in his voice that something serious had happened. "Of course," Antonio replied as he stood from his chair. "I’m on my way." THE BEACH Gabi rolled over on her stomach and settled her book in front of her. Ricardo sat next to her on the towel underneath the umbrella. Ricardo had been a basket case at the house so they were spending the afternoon at the beach. Gabi squinted from the sun to find Ricardo smiling at her. "What are you smiling at?" she asked with a laugh. "You," he answered quickly as he touched her arm. "Me?" Gabi smiled at him. "What about me?" "You’re so relaxed," he said without his practiced stutter. "And you are speaking better every day," she said happily. "You must be working very hard." Ricardo was tired of pretending to not be able to speak. The mere fact that he could communicate would not be enough to send Gabi packing. As long as he depended on her for his daily care, she would be there. "Yes, I am." Suddenly, he looked at her very seriously. "Kiss me." Gabi leaned over and kissed his cheek softly. "No, really kiss me," he commanded her softly. Gabi stared into his dark, sensual eyes as she tipped her head toward him. Ricardo’s pulse quickened as her lips brushed softly against his. He closed his eyes and returned her kiss. Gabi felt a rush from his kiss that she hadn’t felt in a long time…since before she made love to Antonio for the first time. She pulled back quickly, surprised by the feelings he had aroused in her. She smiled shyly at Ricardo and flipped open her book. Ricardo took a deep breath and leaned back against his beach chair. He had sensed her response to his kiss and it was exactly what he had wanted. He would make her fall back in love with him - it was only a matter of time. And when she did…he sat back with a smile and reveled in his plans. In fact, he thought, right about now… BISHOP MORGAN’S OFFICE Antonio stared at the floor; too embarrassed and ashamed to look the Bishop in the eye. Somewhere deep inside his anger raged. He never should have put this past Francesca. She had it out for him since he turned down her advances in Rosario and when she blackmailed Gabi with the tape, he knew she had reached an all time low. But making a copy of the tape of he and Gabi and having it sent to the Bishop…she was a miserable excuse for a human being. "Bishop," he spoke almost in a whisper. "I...I’m..." The Bishop put his hand on Antonio’s shoulder. "My son, when we choose to devote our lives to God, we make a choice to give up many things others take for granted." The words stung Antonio’s heart. "Loving another is the most basic of instincts, given to us by God so He would ensure the continuity of His creation. As priests, we put aside that instinct so that we may give ourselves completely to God’s work." Antonio shook his head without looking up. "It appears you have some decisions to make, Antonio." Antonio raised his head. "You must decide if your commitment to the church is stronger than your love for this woman." Antonio was grateful the Bishop wasn’t fully aware of the adultery of the situation. "If it is not, you must leave the church at once. God won’t love you any less if you can’t fulfill your calling. If you decide that you wish to keep your vows, you must remove yourself totally from your temptation. Recommit yourself to your work, take a spiritual retreat – do whatever you must to refocus your life." Antonio folded his hands in his lap. "We are all tempted, Father. But as priests, we must remain true to our vows." The Bishop took Antonio’s arm as he stood from the chair. "Seek God’s guidance, my son. Spend time praying and reflecting…He will give you the answer." The Bishop picked up the tape from his desk. "No one will see this, I give you my word." Antonio shook his head and offered a melancholy smile before he walked away from the most humiliating moment of his life. BEN & MARIA’S Gabi snuck into Ben’s office and closed the door quietly. Ricardo was reading a book to Benjy in the living room to "work" on his speaking. Maria and Ben were cleaning up the dishes from dinner. Gabi was confused by how she had felt from Ricardo’s kiss earlier. It was almost as if…she shook her head as she quickly dialed the Mission. "Father Antonio." Antonio’s voice was very official. "Hi," Gabi said with a smile. "It’s me." She felt like a schoolgirl sneaking a call to her boyfriend after her parents were in bed. There was a much longer pause than she expected before Antonio spoke. "Hi, Gabi." His voice was unemotional and distant. "How are you," her voice was full of worry. "Is everything okay?" Antonio closed his eyes as he summoned the strength he needed to speak to her. "Fine, Gabi." He hated to be so cold to her, but it was the only way. "Antonio, please tell me what’s wrong." Her sweet soft voice nearly broke him. "Do you want me to come see you? I think I can get out." She needed to be near him, to have him hold her. "No," he answered roughly, taking her by surprise. "I can’t see you, Gabi." Gabi was disappointed. "You’re busy?" "Gabi," he sighed heavily, sending a chill to her core. "I can’t see you...anymore." Gabi’s heart plummeted as tears instantly stung her eyes. "Why, Antonio? What do you mean?" Antonio could hear the distress in her voice. "I mean I can’t be with you, Gabi...I’m a priest and you’re married…to Ricardo." Gabi was confused and he knew it. He had led her on for so long. "I…I’m sorry, Gabi." "But Antonio," she pleaded. "No, Gabi," he said firmly. "I’m sorry...I have to go." He hung up before she had a chance to say another word. If he stayed on the phone with her, he wouldn’t have held his ground. It was the right thing to do…for him, for Ricardo and for Gabi. Antonio stood from his chair and went to the chapel to pray. Gabi held the phone as the dial tone drone in her ear. Tears slipped down her cheeks as her heart broke in her chest. She hurriedly redialed the number to Antonio. "Please, please," she begged for him to answer. "Antonio, please." She dissolved into sobs as she hung up the phone. How could he do this to her now? How could he just fall out of love with her like that? Gabi slipped out the patio doors and ran out onto the darkened beach. She ran until she reached the pier where she slumped to the sand and buried her face in her hands, sobbing until she had no tears left. She remembered every touch, every kiss, every time they made love. He told her he loved her and she had believed him. She couldn’t imagine why he had changed his mind. Gabi lay staring blankly at the ceiling. Ricardo could see that she was upset and he was fairly certain he knew why. Remembering that he wasn’t supposed to be using his legs very much, he used his arms to push himself onto his side to face her. "Is everything okay, Gab?" He smiled softly as she looked at him. "Yeah," she sighed. "Do you need anything before we go to sleep?" "Just you," he replied with simulated sincerity. Gabi was drawn to the way his eyes were caressing her face – his eyes that were so much like Antonio’s. She was feeling alone and rejected after Antonio had pushed her away. She needed to feel loved and wanted. Gabi touched his cheek tenderly as she pressed her full lips softly against his. Ricardo was surprised by her kiss and even more so when she slipped her tongue inside his mouth. He hadn’t expected her to give in to him this way. He took full advantage of her generosity as he slid his hand gently up her middle. Gabi’s breath escaped her as his strong hand lingered on her breast. His touch was so comforting, so welcome. Gabi put her hands under his shirt and caressed his rugged chest. Ricardo was losing himself in her; ready to make love to her when Gabi suddenly backed away. "I’m sorry, Ricardo. I didn’t mean to…" she lay back against her pillow. "I know you can’t…I’m sorry." She felt bad for teasing him like that. Ricardo realized that she thought he wouldn’t physically be able to make love to her which, according to his act, he couldn’t. "It’s okay, Gabi," he whispered as he touched her cheek. "I…forgot too." He hoped he was a convincing liar because his entire body ached for her desperately. For a moment, he was willing to give up his entire charade, his plan of revenge, just to make love to her. Ricardo rolled onto his back with a loud sigh and closed his eyes. Think about baseball, cold showers, anything he told himself. Think about her making love to your brother. Gabi took his hand in hers and closed her eyes. She was breathing rapidly, her mind swimming at what had just happened. She turned to Ricardo because of Antonio’s behavior toward her. That was all…wasn’t it? Did she want Ricardo to make love to her? She squeezed his hand and then rolled away from him. Tears slipped from her eye to her pillow as she cried herself silently to sleep. THE MISSION Antonio was restless, his room was sweltering and the tiny fan provided no relief. He sat up in bed and pulled off his t-shirt tossing it across the room. His conversation with Gabi played heavily on his mind. He knew he had hurt her with his short and cold demeanor. He began to wonder what she was doing right now. Was she awake like he was or sleeping peacefully next to…no, he chided himself. Antonio sighed heavily as a sad smile crossed his lips. He lay back in bed and stared at the ceiling, praying for sleep and dreams of something other than Gabi. BEN & MARIA’S Sunday dinner with the family had become a tradition since Ricardo’s release from the hospital. Antonio had successfully been occupied for the last two weeks…ever since his phone call to Gabi. She hadn’t tried to call him again and he was utterly relieved. It was so much easier to concentrate on the church without her on his mind. Carmen was meeting him at the Mission and bringing him with her this Sunday so she could spend a quality afternoon with all of her children. Ricardo knew he would be coming, but had purposefully avoided telling Gabi. She had been so distracted lately and he wanted to "surprise" her. His plan had been moving along so well that he welcomed the challenge this dinner would bring. Gabi was feeling physically attracted to him and he knew she and Antonio had not been speaking. He was anxious to see how they handled seeing each other again. Unfortunately for Gabi, she was seated directly across from Antonio at the table. She stared intently at her plate, looking only to her left or right and pushing her food around her plate in an attempt to avoid conversation. Antonio kept his eyes equally off of her, speaking in depth to his mother and sister. The tension between them was so thick Ricardo could have grabbed it with his hand from the other end of the table. He reveled at the complete lack of interaction between them. Gabi knew it would be rude to excuse herself from dinner before everyone had finished, but she couldn’t stand another minute across from him. She fussed with her napkin in her lap and stretched her feet out in front of her. Antonio looked up for the first time as her leg brushed against his under the table. Gabi’s heart skipped as her eyes raised without effort after touching his leg. The conversation drowned away as all Gabi could hear was her heart beating. Antonio felt the overwhelming urge to keep looking at her, but forced himself to move his leg and look away. Gabi pushed her chair back abruptly and threw her napkin onto the table. "Excuse me," she mumbled as she bolted from the room. Antonio was the only one who didn’t watch her leave. Ricardo smiled in amazement at how long she had managed to stay. He looked at Antonio and smiled wryly. Antonio returned his brother’s smile and turned back to the conversation with Maria. Gabi hid in her room until she was able to calm down. She was angry at Antonio...how could he ignore her like that, moving his leg as if her touch burned him. She paced the room as she fumed. Gabi knew she couldn’t avoid everyone all night, so she made her way into the kitchen as Maria cleared the dishes. "Are you okay, Gabi?" Maria asked with concern. "I’m fine...I’m just not feeling very well," Gabi said quietly as she helped Maria with the dishes. The door opened as Antonio peeked inside. His heart dropped as his eyes fell on Gabi. He looked quickly to Maria. "Thanks for dinner, Maria. I have to get going." Maria stepped to the door and Antonio slipped into the hall without acknowledging Gabi. She smacked her hand roughly against the counter. What the hell is going on with him, she thought. I have to talk to him alone - tonight. She racked her brain to figure out how she could slip away from Ricardo to see Antonio and find out what had happened between them. Gabi opened the cabinet and pulled out Ricardo’s painkillers. The label on the side cautioned extreme drowsiness after the recommended dose of one capsule. Perfect, she thought as she retrieved a glass of juice for him. She turned quickly to make sure she was alone before she opened the bottle and extracted three pills. Hastily, she broke the capsules spilling the powder into the juice. She disposed of the empty capsules and stirred the juice with a spoon. She would see Antonio tonight and make him talk to her once and for all. She had to know why he stopped loving her.
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