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Gabi began to stir as the blackness faded to gray before easing back into the light of day. Her head was spinning as she struggled to sit up on the suddenly much more comfortable couch. She realized she was no longer in the waiting room but was reclined on a hospital bed in a private room. Startled and confused, she groaned from disorientation attracting attention from the Torres family huddled in the corner.
"Gabi," Ricardo sighed with relief as he walked over to the bed and took her small hand in his. "Finally. How are you feeling?" "Ri..Ricardo? Wh..what happened?" She rubbed her eyes in an attempt to clear her still hazy vision. "You passed out, baby, right into my arms." Ricardo caressed her shoulder as he narrowed his eyes. "Are you sure you're alright? Maybe I should call the doctor in." "No," she replied quickly. "I..I'm fine." Gabi sat up in the bed to prove her point; she was far more concerned about Antonio. "What time is it?" Ricardo consulted the clock on the far wall. "Almost 4:30." "4:30!" Gabi exclaimed. "How's Antonio? Is he out of surgery yet?" The grimness of the expressions that surrounded her accelerated her heartbeat and turned her stomach. Carmen turned to stare out the window as Maria wrapped her arm lovingly around her mother's shoulder. Gabi clutched Ricardo's hand more tightly. "Ricardo?" she queried weakly. Taking a deep breath, Ricardo delivered the news. "He just came out, Gabi, about half an hour ago." Gabi searched his eyes finding the despair she had hoped not to. "He's not awake yet." "What did they say, Ricardo? About…" Gabi couldn't make herself say the words. "They don't know, Gabi," Ricardo reported sadly. "They won't know until T wakes up and they can do some tests." Carmen sobbed quietly while Maria comforted her. Ricardo sat on the edge of Gabi's bed holding her shaking hand and pushing her hair off her forehead. Gabi stared silently into space trying not to think of the horrible outcome of what was fast becoming the worst day of her life. It was almost 5:00 when Maria suggested to Ricardo that they take Carmen to get something to eat. He wanted Gabi to come along, but she declined saying she still felt a little lightheaded and needed to rest; what she really needed was to see Antonio. Ricardo nodded and deposited a tender kiss on her lips before he and Maria escorted Carmen to the cafeteria. When she was certain they were gone, Gabi climbed from the bed and peered out the door into the hall. The nurses' station was just outside; Gabi hurriedly made her way over and asked for Antonio's room number. "He's just been moved from the recovery room to ICU. Are you family?" the nurse asked and Gabi nodded. "Very well. Just follow the blue line down the hall and around the corner. It will lead you down the corridor to the ICU. Mr. Torres is in room 465." "Thank you," Gabi smiled as she set out on her quest. Nearly running down the hall, she followed the floor marker to the ICU. All of the rooms circled around a main nurses' station; many of the patients here were hooked up to life support machines. She wondered why they had Antonio on such a floor; fear overcame her as she realized that his condition must be more critical than Ricardo had told her. Quickening her step, she made her way around the circle finally stopping before Antonio's door; the wall was glass but the privacy curtain had been drawn so she wasn't able to see inside. She hesitated outside before a nurse placed her hand on Gabi's shoulder. "Why don't you go on in? He's not awake yet, but he'll know that you're here." Gabi managed a smile as the nurse gently eased her toward Antonio's door. "He can only have one visitor at a time and he does need his rest. If you need anything, just press the call button and I'll be right in, okay?" The nurse squeezed Gabi's shoulder and left her at the door; her hand trembled as she reached for the handle. She opened the door quietly and stepped in. Antonio was sleeping peacefully; the monitors beeped softly alerting Gabi to the blissful fact that his heart was still beating. The white cotton blanket made his tanned skin appear even more bronzed. He had no visible wounds or scars, no evidence to the serious extent of his injury. A drop of moisture fell to her cheek as she moved slowly to the side of his bed. She pulled the chair closer and sat down beside him; not knowing what to do, she sat silently for a few minutes. Gabi desperately hoped he would turn his head to her, crack an amazing smile and ask her if she had nothing better to do than to watch him sleep. She chuckled at the thought making more tears fall as she slipped her fingers carefully underneath his palm and wrapped his hand around hers. His skin was once again warm; it had been frighteningly cold on the ride in the ambulance. His lips were blushed with the color of life; his face no longer pale and sallow. "Oh, Antonio," Gabi sighed as she ran her fingers tenderly up his arm. "I'm so, so sorry you're here." She felt such tremendous guilt for being the reason Antonio was fighting for his life. "I shouldn't have come to the center this morning. If only I hadn't…I hadn't…" If what Gabi, she thought to herself. If only you hadn't gotten into the car with him this morning? More like, if you hadn't ever laid eyes on him all those months ago: hadn't become his best friend, fallen in love with him, made love to him when you thought you both were going to die, and then accepted the proposal of his brother. If he hadn't denied what he truly felt for you; refused to leave the priesthood to be with you, kept his love for you to himself then made the decision to free himself of the church after you were engaged to his brother. If only, if only…if only their love hadn't been forbidden from the start. The culmination being Antonio lying in a hospital bed with a bullet wound he had selflessly taken for the woman he loved. "Antonio," she whispered as she leaned close to his ear. "I love you, I've always loved you and I always will. You will get better, I promise you. I'll be right by your side." Gabi's voice faltered with emotion. "I want to be with you, Antonio, no matter what." The door opened and the doctor entered Antonio's room. "Ah, I'm glad you're here," he commented as he opened Antonio's chart. "His family has arrived?" "Yes," Gabi replied as she swiped away her tears and moved close to where he stood. The doctor appeared professionally unaware of her emotions. "They went to get his mother some coffee. They should be here soon." "Good. I'd like to speak with his mother. He should be coming out of anesthesia very soon and we all need to be on the same page before he does." "Page?" Gabi queried. Damn doctor-ease, she thought. "What do you mean?" Just as the doctor was about to answer, Carmen, Maria and Ricardo came through the door. Carmen rushed to Antonio's side taking his hand in hers and immediately began to pray. Maria and Ricardo stopped at the conversation the doctor and Gabi were about to have. "Here you are, Gabi," Ricardo smiled as he put his arm around her and kissed her. The doctor raised an eyebrow in confusion; he had been under the impression that Gabi was Antonio's fiancée. "Doctor, how is my brother?" Carmen kissed Antonio's cheek and stepped into the conversation as well. "Yes, doctor, mi hijo? How is he?" "Why don't we step into the hall?" The doctor held the door while the family filtered into the corridor. He closed the door and removed his glasses; his voice was hushed and gentle. "Antonio had a bit of a rough time in surgery. He had already lost quite a lot of blood and due to the extent of damage the bullet caused, we had to keep him open longer than we would have liked." A collective gasp was heard from the family. "He went into shock but we were able to stabilize him quickly and were, thankfully, finished with surgery and beginning to close." Carmen stifled a sob and Ricardo wrapped his arm around her. "The complication was what took so long for us to finish. He's resting comfortably and his vitals are strong. As I told Ms. Martinez, he should be waking up very soon." "Thank you doctor, for doing such a good job with my son," Carmen exulted. "God was with my Antonio." She made the sign of the cross and kissed her rosary. "Mrs. Torres," the doctor said calmly. "Antonio came through surgery, but the road ahead is far more of a concern at this point. As I told you before, the bullet did a tremendous amount of damage and we can't be sure of any resulting paralysis until Antonio is awake and we can do some tests." The doctor paused and lowered his head. "At this point, I'm only cautiously optimistic." "Doctor?" The nurse poked her head out from Antonio's room. "He's waking up." As the family began an exuberant trek into his room, the doctor stayed the door with his hand. "I'm going to need you all to wait here. It's imperative that I check him out before he sees anyone. Please have a seat in the waiting room and I'll come out with my findings." He turned away to enter Antonio's room. "Please. I'll be with you as soon as I can." As the doctor closed the door, Maria took Carmen's arm and led her down the corridor. Gabi pressed her hand up against the glass as Ricardo put his hand against her shoulder. "Come on, Gab," he persuaded her gently. "The doctor will come and talk to us soon." Reluctantly, she allowed Ricardo to direct her away from his door and to the waiting room. They sat in silence, each praying for good news. Antonio could see the white light become brighter and he heard someone speaking his name. Blinking furiously to remove the intrusive light, he struggled to ask for Gabi. "G…Ga…" His throat was so dry that it hurt too much and all he could do was groan. "I think he must be asking for Gabi," the nurse offered. "Ms. Martinez." "Yes," the doctor concurred. "Antonio? Can you hear me?" Antonio moved his head from side to side. The nurse smiled at the doctor and made a note in his chart. "Antonio. If you're trying to ask for Gabi, she's just outside. She'll be in to see you soon." The words were taking shape in his ears. Gabi…outside…soon. He relaxed as it registered that Gabi was okay and she would see him soon. The drugs they had given him for pain were beginning to wear off and he was rising out of the haze that blanketed his mind. His eyes opened and he could see the sterile white walls and the two medical staff standing above him. Once again, he attempted to speak. "W…wh…" "You're in the hospital, Antonio. Do you remember what happened?" Antonio closed his eyes as he recalled every second of what had taken place; the last thing he could see was Gabi kneeling beside him on the ground as he told her goodbye. "Y…yes." "Good, that's good." The nurse continued to make notes. "Now, Antonio, I want you to tell me if you feel any pain, alright?" "Y…yes." Antonio licked his lips to wet them; his mouth was dry and he really wanted some water. The doctor used the edge of his reflex mallet to touch various parts of Antonio's body. "Here?" the doctor asked as he touched Antonio's shoulder. "Can you feel any pain here?" "No," Antonio replied, the sound coming slightly easier from his mouth. "Here?" the doctor placed the mallet against his chest. "No." "What about here?" He touched Antonio's arm. "No." The nurse continued to make notes as the doctor tested for feeling. "Okay. You can feel the mallet, but you don't feel any pain, is that right Antonio?" The doctor wanted to confirm Antonio's responses. "Yes. Was…wasn't I s..shot in the s…stomach though?" Antonio wondered why the doctor was asking him about all these other parts of his body when his wound was in his abdomen. The nurse smiled softly as the doctor answered. "Yes, Antonio. We need to check a few more things, okay. What about here? Any pain?" The doctor touched his mallet to the side of Antonio's hip. Antonio didn't respond. "Antonio?" "I'm waiting for you to touch me," he answered. The smile faded from the nurse's lips as she glanced down at her chart. "I'm ready." "Okay, Antonio. Let's try this again." The doctor touched Antonio's wrist. "Here." "No pain," Antonio reported growing tired of this routine. "I want you to close your eyes Antonio. Just relax for a minute." Antonio closed his eyes and the doctor pulled the blanket back off his legs. Antonio couldn't tell what the doctor was doing but he hoped he wouldn't fall back to sleep before seeing Gabi. The doctor tapped the head of the mallet against Antonio's knee. The nurse made a note. He moved down to the end of the bed and dragged the handle of the mallet upward against the bottom of Antonio's foot. With a curt nod to the nurse, the doctor pulled the blanket back over Antonio's legs and moved back up to the head of the bed. "Alright Antonio. I'm going to go get your family now." Antonio opened his eyes. "Just lie still and relax. We'll be right back in." "Okay." He closed his eyes once again still slightly drowsy from the anesthesia. He was anxious to see Gabi; he wanted her to know that he was awake and alright. The doctor stood before the Torres Family and Gabi and reported the results of his preliminary tests. "I'm sorry," he said as Gabi buried her head into Ricardo's chest and Carmen and Maria stood holding hands. "I haven't told him yet. I wanted you all to be with him when he hears the news. He's going to need your support." "Of course," Ricardo assured him as he turned to his mother. "We have to be strong, mama, for Antonio." They walked in silence back to his room. The doctor nodded to them all then ushered them inside. Antonio heard the door open and turned his head; his eyes falling first to Gabi; he was surprised to see that his whole family was here. They were all smiling at him but he could see that they looked very upset. "I'm fine mama," Antonio called out to her as she moved away from Maria and next to his bed. "See," he said as he took her hand. "Fine." Carmen pushed the hair off his forehead and leaned over to kiss him. Maria took the other side of the bed and grabbed his right hand; Antonio had wanted Gabi to hold him, but he knew that she couldn't. Gabi and Ricardo stood quietly behind Carmen. "Antonio," the doctor began. "The test that I just did gave us some important information." Antonio's smile weakened slightly but he still didn't know what the doctor was about to say. "When you were shot, the bullet entered through your abdomen and lodged in your back just below one of your vertebrae. We managed to remove it during surgery, but I'm afraid you may have suffered permanent damage." Antonio's eyes scanned his families faces then caught Gabi's eyes; he saw it plain as day as her eyes glistened with tears. While he had been looking around, the doctor had placed his hand on Antonio's leg. Antonio looked down from Gabi's face to his leg then his face went blank; he couldn't feel the doctor's hand.
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